Asked by Wiki User. ":: Siegfried on Roy: "Am I hurting you? ":: George W. Bush, 2004: "Check it out, we got Cat Stevens! New show with Meryl Streep and Al Pacino: Ruben Studdard: waiting for album to drop:: Clay Aiken: waiting for testes to drop, Ozzy Osbourne: nearly killed himself operating an all-terrain vehicle:: Jessica Simpson: nearly killed herself operating a shoe, Tiger Woods: stands up to tee:: Conan O'Brien: sits down to pee, Bullish: optimistic about the stock market:: bearish: James Gandolfini in a steam room, President Bush: got drugs for seniors:: Rush Limbaugh: bought drugs from sophomores, Ruben Studdard's left brain: "I hope my latest album goes platinum. ":: Yankee Stadium: "Son of a bitch, there's a steel beam in my skull! Conan O’Brien Pericles Ross Perot Randy Quaid Ronald Reagan Charlie Rose Bob Saget Will Smith Ben Stiller Neil deGrasse Tyson Denzel Washington Robert Anton Wilson John Wooden. Any resemblance to persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental or is intended purely as a satire, parody or spoof. ":: George W. Bush: "A Weeble wobbling shall not fall down. ":: Elton John's Christmas party: "I hope that's eggnog. ":: Reuben Studdard in 2004: "Where are the BLTs? ", Red Sox: famous for coming from behind:: Richard Simmons: helps a lot of people lose weight, Extra pay: overtime:: no pay: Hammer Time, When in Rome: do as the Romans do:: when in Paris: be quick and give the next guy his chance, Britney Spears, 2000: "Hit me baby, one more time. ", Moldy bread: yucky loaf:: Evan Marriott: lucky oath, Bruce Springsteen walking into Grammys: "Bruuuuuuce! ":: Lindsay Lohan: "They try to make me go to rehab, I say 'blopple, blurdle, drive smash, vomit, slub slub, zzzzz'. ":: Dennis Kucinich: "The government is after me Lucky Charms! ":: Bill Clinton: "Never take my Hustler lesbian issue. ":: George W. Bush "I could eat me a whole big thing of potato salad. ", John Kerry, 1970: received a Purple Heart while serving in the Me Kong Delta:: George W. Bush, 1970: received a purple nurple while partying with Delta Kappa Delta, John F. Kennedy: "Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country. ":: Reuben Studdard: "There's a planet in my pants. The Conan O'Brien Wiki is a FANDOM TV Community. And, by the way, Cheney's daughter is gay. Picasso Authenticity Fails Conan O'Brien Test Written by P.M. Wortham. The funny story above is a satire or parody. ", Fuse: explosion:: Taco Bell's Burrito Supreme: explosion, Bill Clinton: address at inaugural:: Mike Dukakis: address unknown, Jerry McGuire: "Show me the money! ":: People who see a pregnant Nicole Richie: "Who stuffed an avocado inside that cocktail straw? Who is the longest reigning WWE Champion of all time? ":: Eminem: "Do me, bitch. Though Picasso died in 1973, his estate was meticulously managed by members of the artist's family. ", Coffee mug of President Bush's desk: "World's best dad":: Coffee mug on Vice President Cheney's desk: "Waterboarding is technically not torture, unless the procedure results in organ failure", Joe Girardi: may manage the Yankees:: Justin Guarini: may manage a Wendy's. Last-minute play in football: the "Hail Mary" pass:: last-minute play at Richard Simmons party: the "nail Gary" pass, Prince Charles: wakes up each morning in a stone castle:: Courtney Love: wakes up each morning behind a White Castle, CBS: #1 network with three of the top five shows:: NBC: #1 network with three of the five letters that you use to spell "bacon", Shaquille O'Neal: puts an average of 25 points on the board:: Snoop Dogg: keeps an average of 25 joints in his Ford, Disney World in Orlando: you get to meet Goofy:: Disney World in Hong Kong: you get to eat Goofy, John Roberts: "I want to serve on the supreme court. Copyright © 2020 Multiply Media, LLC. No more clap! ", Tecumseh: Shawnee in war paint:: Christina Aguilera: banshee in whore paint, Angry Americans: "Let's send troops to Afghanistan! ":: Ruben Studdard's right brain: "I could swallow a pig if you sanded its hooves. ", Matt Damon: "acting first, writing second":: Keanu Reeves: "socks first, shoes second", Oprah Winfrey: "My next guest has a Pulitzer prize. ":: Arnold Schwarzenegger's speech when he says it: "Eggs and Dalmatians awaken Sean Connery. ":: Anna Nicole Smith: "Give me pork rinds or give me 'ludes. ", John Edwards: "ambulance chaser":: Dick Cheney: "ambulance rider", Alex Rodriguez's nickname in high school: "A-Rod":: Conan O'Brien's nickname in high school: "Gay-Wad", Washington Irving character: Rip Van Winkle:: John Kerry nickname: Face Van Wrinkle, Las Vegas Hilton: can accommodate 5,000 visiting conventioneers in one weekend:: Paris Hilton: can accommodate 5,001 visiting conventioneers in one weekend, Michael Jackson, 2004: surrounded by legal team:: Michael Jackson, 2003: surrounded by kickball team, Senator John McCain: proudly speaks his own mind:: President Bush: proudly spells his own name, Former Miami Dolphin Ricky Williams: tested positive for marijuana:: marijuana: tested positive for Snoop Dogg, Phrase that starts the Olympics: "Let the games begin! ", Hillary Clinton: cleaned up in the fundraising department:: Bill Clinton: cleaned up after fun in Daisy's apartment, Coca-Cola: known by millions as Coke:: Sanjaya: known by millions as joke, Bono: knighted by Queen:: Clay Aiken: queen by night, Leeza Gibons: dances with two left feet:: Heather Mills: keeps two extra left feet in the trunk of her car, Acupuncture: getting pricked again and again and again in every part of your body:: Paris Hilton: hotel heiress, Abraham Lincoln: "A house divided can not stand. ", George W. Bush: desperate to drill into the frozen tundra of Alaska:: Bill Clinton: just heard of tundra, wants some, Enron executives, 1999: "Our assets will soar! Pagkakaiba ng pagsulat ng ulat at sulating pananaliksik? Authorities were still hoping to declare the basement find "authentic", given the obscure interpretation that could be made about the cubist style, but were convinced of the ruse after finding the "Conan O'Brien painting". ":: Donald Rumsfeld to detainees: "It puts the lotion on its skin or else it gets the hose again. ", Star Jones at wedding: blushing bride:: Star Jones on honeymoon: crushing bride, Paris Hilton's perfume: available for $29.95:: Paris Hilton: available for $19.95, Dick Cheney: "Never made my daughter's lesbianism an issue. ":: Terrell Owens, 2006: "What will it take to get you out of here in this new Honda? ", John Kerry: spent war fighting Vietcong:: George W. Bush: spend war lighting neon bong, Fantasia Barrino: excited about new CD:: Reuben Studdard: excited about new KFC, Maria Sharapova: won in straight sets:: Martina Narvatilova: runs from straight sex, Former California governor Ronald Reagan: "Win one for the Gipper. ":: Bill Clinton: "Woohoo! ", Kenneth Lay in a board meeting: "Oh no, our stock dropped! ":: Max Weinberg: "I came, I paid, she left. ", Mike Tyson: famous even though he's a public menace:: Anna Kournikova: famous even though she sucks at tennis, Colin Powell: close to settling the conflict in the Middle East:: Calista Flockhart: close to finishing the TGI Fridays barbecue beef platter, PT Barnum: displayed freaks and oddities for profit:: Liza Minelli: recently published wedding photos, Michael Jackson: borrowed a lot of his moves from James Brown:: a Catholic priest: borrowed a lot of his moves from Michael Jackson, LA police: carefully studying Robert Blake's motives:: Frank Gifford: carefully studying Robert Blake's methods, Spiderman: does whatever a spider can:: Max Weinberg: does whoever he meets on the can, 12 or fewer: items in supermarket express lane:: 12 or younger: item's in R. Kelly's limo, Al Qaeda forces: regrouping in Pakistan, plotting attacks:: Hall and Oates: regrouping in Hall's van, plotting new album, Arizona: intense burning threatens wildlife:: Max Weinberg: intense burning threatens sex life, Chinese food: full of soy sauce:: Siegfried: full of Roy sauce, Dwight D. Eisenhower: fights Nazis with successful invasion:: George W. Bush: fights Saddam with month-long vacation, Winona Ryder: guards circle her in famous shops:: Mel Gibson: guards family from circles in crops, Elvis Presley, the king of rock and roll:: 25th anniversary of his death:: Michael Jackson, the king of pop: 25th anniversary of first nose job, skin lightening, chin reconstruction, and llama seduction, Max Weinberg: currently touring with the biggest rock and roll act of the summer surrounded by adoring fans and sexy groupies:: Conan O'Brien: currently sitting behind a desk reading SAT analogies, Tiger Woods: eying his 9th major:: R. Kelly: eying his 9th minor, Signal to evacuate school building: fire alarm:: signal to evacuate movie theater: now showing, Crazy: stalking Serena Williams:: lazy: stalking Ted Williams, Boston archdiocese sex abuse settlement: 10 million dollars:: Michael Jackson: didn't realize there were discount rates in Boston, Pinata: a candy-filled treat for children:: Anna Nicole Smith: a Quaalude-filled treat for America, Big Mac without the cheese: 20% less fat:: N*Sync without Justin Timberlake: 80% less gay, NutraSweet: sugar substitute:: N*Sync: talent substitute, L.A. dockworkers: ordered back to work by President Bush:: MC Hammer: ordered back to work by 16 year old Denny's assistant manager, Hannibal Lecter: punished for eating men:: Daryl Hall: still unpunished for singing, Last day of October: when children apply frightening makeup:: every day of the year: when Christina Aguilera applies frightening makeup, Lifespan of a tortoise: 150 years:: lifespan of a housefly: Ben and J-Lo's marriage, Rock groupie: "I'm with the band. ", Jesus, 1st century A.D.: reigns over Israelites:: Jesus, 21st century A.D.: reigns over, Fiery beast who lives on Monster Island: Mothra:: Fiery beast who lives on Rikers Island: Martha, John Kerry's thought on the Democratic convention: hopes to be nominated:: Al Sharpton's thoughts on the Democratic convention: hopes that it's catered, Carmen Electra and David Navarro: "'Til death do us part. ":: Conan O'Brien: "My next guest can eat 15 Oscar Meyer wieners. ", Placido Domingo: one third of the Three Tenors:: Luciano Pavarotti: one third of the Earth's surface, Michael Jordan. ", Human Torch: teams up with Invisible Woman:: Max Weinberg: teams up with inflatable woman, Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie: "Bradgelina":: Bobby Brown and Whitney Houston: "Screwy McLawbreak and his walking pharmacy wife", Rolling Stones, 1969: "You can't always get what you want. ", Britney and Madonna: shared a lewd, famed kiss on stage:: Siegfried and Roy: shared a dude named Chris backstage, New York Yankees fan: "Don't worry, we'll get 'em next year! ", Winslow Homer: famous for painting oceans and shores:: Christina Aguilera: famous for painting her face like a whore, Totally hot celebrity couple: Tom Cruise and Penelope Cruz:: totally disturbing celebrity couple: Conan O'Brien and Pat O'Brien, President Bush: "I want to spend a month in Crawford, Texas. Ano ang mga kasabihan sa sa aking kababata? ":: George W. Bush: "Who's Franklin Delano Roosevelt? ENTJ. It is entirely fictitious. ":: Mel Gibson's dad: "Dog bites are caused by rabbis. How much does does a 100 dollar roblox gift card get you in robhx? ", Popular toy: Tickle Me Elmo:: unpopular toy: Fondle Me Jacko, Martha Stewart: sold ImClone after tip off:: Jacket Jackson: showed nipple after kick-off, Howard Dean: listing all the states:: George W. Bush: learning all the states, John Kerry: "I represent the American middle class. Bailout bill: returned to the House stuffed with tremendous amount of pork:: Kirstie Alley: are you really going to make us spell it out for you? ":: Kenneth Lay in prison: "Oh no, my soap dropped! Conan O'Brien. ":: Melissa Rivers: "I'm a celebrity. What is the hink-pink for blue green moray? ":: Aretha Franklin: "A pie baked is a pie eaten. Click here to be a writer! ", Bob Dylan: "The times, they are a changing. ", Gary Condit's interview with Connie Chung: "This will save my career. The 2010 Tonight Show conflict was a media and public relations conflict involving American television network NBC and two of its then-late-night talk show hosts, Conan O'Brien and Jay Leno.Leno, the host of long-running franchise The Tonight Show since 1992, and O'Brien, host of Late Night since 1993, were strong ratings leaders for the network for much of the decade.
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